Pickup Lines Home | Pickup Lines Blog | Pickup Lines for Girls | Cute Pickup Lines | Pickup Lines for Guys | Romantic Pickup Lines

Corny Pickup Lines
Funny Pickup Lines
Best Pickup Lines
Sweet Pickup Lines
Dirty Pickup Lines
Cheesy Pickup Lines
Worst Pickup Lines
Stupid Pickup Lines
Good Pickup Lines
Bad Pickup Lines
Flattery
Site Map
Privacy Policy

Dirty Pickup Lines - Off Color Pick Up Lines

Sometimes you're at a bar and you're not feeling like Robert Redford or John Cusack even. Sometimes you're just feeling like Sam Kinison or Howard Stern, and you just want to say something dirty and hope it works. These dirty pickup lines are for you if that's the kind of mood you're in.

  • The last woman I was with said, “Kiss me where it stinks.” So, I drove her to New Jersey.
  • Didn’t you used to be known as John Holmes?
  • Can I park my car in your garage? It’s pretty big, but it doesn’t leak.
  • Mind if I make like a Hoover on your wing-wang there?
  • Have you heard The Rolling Stones’ album, A Bigger Bang? If you go home with me, they will have named it after us.
  • Aren’t you the guy who gets fan mail from Ron Jeremy?
  • My face seats five; where’s your ticket?
  • I grew up during the sixties, with the peace and love generation. If I can’t get some love, I’d like to get a piece.
  • You’re so hot, I’ll bet your vibrator is made of asbestos.
  • We’re having a penis-measuring contest over there. Do you have a yardstick that we could borrow?
  • Talk Dirty to MeWell spread my cheeks and call me ‘cell bitch;’ you’re prettier than anyone I ever met in the joint!
  • Having sex is a lot like golf. I’m always happy when I get a hole in one.
  • I have a tongue like an anteater; want to go to the zoo?
  • I’m an interior decorator. I can fill your interior; I see something big and pink.
  • I’m a Virgo. What’s your sign – Fire Down Below?
  • Congratulations! You have just been voted "Most Beautiful Boy/Girl In This Room," and the grand prize is a night with me!
  • On my last date, we played strip poker. We stripped, and I poked her.
  • You remind me of an animal – skunk pussy.
  • I'm French. Do you have any French in you? Would you like some?
  • That dress would look great on my bedroom floor!
  • Do you cum here, often?
  • I’ve got a buff tongue and I know how to use it!
  • (If you ever run into someone with a blue tongue) Have you been giving Papa Smurf a blowjob?
  • The word for tonight is “legs.” Do you want to spread the word?
  • Have you ever bought a vibrator? (No.) Do you want to rent one?
  • Let’s play army. You can blow the hell out of me!
  • If I saw you naked, I’d die happy.
  • Want to see my hard drive? It ain’t 3.5 inches, and it ain’t floppy!
  • Ever tried those weird, prickly condoms?
  • I’ve never seen such a big bulge in a man’s pants. Wait a minute, yes I have – mine.
  • Do you want to go skinny-dipping?
  • I can screw like mad in this wheelchair.
  • Lie down on that couch and pretend your feet hate each other.
  • Did you hear the one about the really ugly man, and I mean REALLY ugly man, who goes into a bar? He sits down at the bar and within seconds he is talking to a bunch of women. Very soon he walks out of the bar with two of the most beautiful women. Disheartened by this, a good-looking man asks the bartender, "Excuse me, but that really ugly man just came in here and left with those two stunning women. What's his secret? He's as ugly as sin and I'm everything a girl could want, but I haven't been able to hook up all night. What's going on?" "Well," says the bartender, "I don't know how he does it, but he does the same thing every night. He walks in, orders a drink, and just sits there licking his eyebrows." (Then, lick your eyebrows.)

Hope you enjoyed the "dirty pickup lines" on this page.

Seduction and Pick Up Articles

David DeAngelo - Double Your Dating
Can David DeAngelo really help you "double your dating"? An objective profile and opinion of "cocky and funny" David DeAngelo.

The Seduction Community - Artists and Seduction Gurus
A somewhat skeptical and critical look at what the "seduction community" is and what "seduction coaches" teach.

The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists
A review of the Neil Strauss book that was among the first to expose the "Community", a not-so-secret society of pickup artists.

The Mystery Method
Another info product similar to Double Your Dating, but this one comes from another perspective. We provide a detailed review.