How to Be Spontaneous
How to Be Spontaneous and Fun
Some of us live and die by our schedules. We are deliberate, methodical, and endless list makers. I am a bone fide planner. When the first generations of Palm devices came out, I thought they were the best things since sliced bread. And while I still don’t like to go anywhere or do anything without consulting my little external brain, I realize that a little spontaneity is good for the soul. While it would be quite difficult to change the basic personality of someone like me into someone who lives through improvisation, it is possible to inject a little helpful chaos into any life. Here are some tips about how to be spontaneous and fun with your girl. Being more spontaneous in your relationship (and in the bedroom) should improve your love life.
It’s the Same, but Different
If, like me, you are a planner, take small steps toward adding something unplanned to your day. If you always pack a lunch to work, leave it in the fridge and go out for lunch. If you always walk the dog at 7 am on the bike path, choose a different route, or a different time. It’s about varying your routine in simple ways, so that your experiences will change, not about upending your entire life in one moment.
The Problem with Long Term Relationships
Any relationship can become stale over time. Friends, co-workers, or romantic partners can become predictable, or we can become predictable to them. It is the flip side of comfortable–when a relationship is taken for granted, it ceases to grow and change. Practicing spontaneity can keep relationships fresh. If Friday night is always dinner out and a movie, plan an indoor picnic and rent a classic film or watch home movies instead. It’s the same, but different. Mix it up with your kids: have a backwards dinner (dessert first!) or breakfast for dinner, or pizza for breakfast. It’s especially easy for sexual relationships to become predictable, where intimacy becomes a chore rather than something mutually exhilarating and passionate. Change your evening routine. Unplug the TV, turn off the computer and choose to spend one evening a week without distractions. Try a different sexual position. You don’t have to be a contortionist or learn the Kama Sutra, just shift which one of you is on top. If you always make love in the dark, turn on a light, or use candles. If you always keep your eyes closed, open them. Small changes in the sensory experience can lead to large changes in enjoyment.
Benefits of Spontaneity
And why would I want to mess up my perfectly organized day? Well, life doesn’t often follow predictable schedules and a life tied up in routine can get boring, not only for me, but for the people in my life. Also, practicing spontaneity, as ironic as that seems, can actually prepare you for when things don’t go according to plan. It’s like learning to walk on uneven ground–the next time you trip, you might just catch yourself.
See also:
- How to Use Body Language
- How to Get Girls to Notice You
- How to Attract Women Tips
- How to Make Out with a Girl
- How to Create a Perfect Date
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